2012 Already??

In 2012, I resolve to: Improve my health, work more, forgive more, say "no!" to gossup, be kinder, talk less, keep up with blogging (I have so many things to write, I am so behind), but first of all (not last) focus on Jesus.

The strange thing to the above, other than being truthful with myself, is I dont talk much.  Most people say I am quiet.  Well , I am quiet!.  I truly feel people dont want to hear what I have to say.  I would rather write than talk.  But, I love talking.  I love when people ask me questions.  I am bad about jumping into a conversation because my mom always told me to not interupt others when they are talking.  My pet peeve is those who dominate a conversation.  So truthfully, I need to be more social.  I married a social butterfly.  He talks to everyone!  Me, I am very antisocial.  Thats how I think people think of me.  Yes, I do worry what other "think" of me.  This is another area I need to work on.  I need to only worry about what God thinks of me.  If he is happy with me, then I am ok.  People seem to let me down and cause me pain.  This is another reason I dont talk.  Yes..I do need to talk less..yes!  Whenever I do say something, it is the wrong thing.  I have wanted to take back many things I have said to people.  I try to say only positive things but most things I say are negative.  People get a look on their face when I say something, and they get up and walk away.  Oh well.  I try. 

My health is so bad.  Partly my fault.  I am a diabetic, but you would never know it.  I am a sugar addict.  The two dont go together.  I need to move more.  I love the treadmill but dont have  gym membership.   I spend way too much time on the computer and in front of the tv.  But then sometimes if I just sit, I fall asleep.  Speaking of sleep, I dont sleep at night.  My arm hurts and I have a very itchy rash that comes and goes.  Doctors dont seem concerned, so I try not to worry.  But the anxiety of the itching is unbarable sometimes.  Homeopathic meds seem to help though.  I need to eat better and move.  This will help me in so many ways. 

I try to be very kind and sweet.  Thinking of others first before myself.  But my attitude that I am nothing is not Godly.  Self pity is ..well..SELF!  I am guilty of gossup.  I need to really think about this and find my motives for when I talk about someone else.  Motive is the bottom like.  So I do need to really do better with this.  Love  and peace should be the motive for all that I have to say.  With the Lord's help, I will be able to do better.

I have another blog coming about how my quiet positive attitude is working for me.  God made me like I am and he has a reason...He has a plan for me.  I should not try and change the way God made me.  I have an example about how my quietness and not backing down on what I believe and stating what the Bible says even with hostile people, is working and showing with love of Jesus.   I have peace.  Truly I do.